10.25.2015

art by richelle rae.

Work In Progress

I've become stuck in my painting process. 

A few years ago I narrowed down my hobbies and chose to pursue painting. I found inspiration in an artist who through her painting process gave me permission to paint in a way that I didn't know was 'allowed'. I've never attended formal training in painting and always thought that painting started with a blank white canvas upon which you drew out your image in pencil and then painted it in like a paint-by-number.

How wrong was I?!

Although I was awaken to that my brain is stuck at a fence that seems to be too high for my short legs to leap over.

The part of creativity that I enjoy is the challenges. I want to push myself, I want to create breakthroughs in my work.

All of my pieces result with images resembling feathers/leaves. This is ok, I enjoy feathers and leaves, they do represent a part of who I am.

But I want to go further.

I've taken to searching youtube for acrylic painters who have filmed themselves painting a piece from start to finish. I've been shown a multitude of new techniques to try. I may borrow a technique for a time, but I prefer to adapt it and make it my own.

I want to leap over this fence and land on the other side of 'stuckness'.

I want to see what happens when I completely shut my mind off.

What lurks there?

When I shut down all that I have learned or picked up frorm other painters, what will come through?

I don't know.

I don't know if there's anything on the other side of that fence, or if I will be able to jump it, but I have to try.

I don't like living in 'stuckness'. I want to progress, move forward, dig deeper inside myself.

I want to find the dark muck at the back of my mind, right where my soul opens up to the whole universe.

I have a date with some paints.

10.15.2015

yes.

Source

I was hoping to find a good quote to start this piece of rambling and BAM! 

SO intense :)

If you know me, then you know that I am girl power all the way. This quote is just YES! Excellent for what it is that I am planning.

I've had a lot of alone time this year. When that happens I find myself contemplating life, cuz I don't do that enough on a daily basis ;) 

I took up journaling again, something I've done in the past here and there as I've found myself going thru periods of growth. This year has caused my soul to grow to a place where I can see my future. I wandered aimlessly for many years, trying this and that hoping to find my niche. It's not until now that I can look back and connect the dots and see how the path lead me to where I am today.

Thru journaling I ask the Universe all the common questions,

Who am I?

What is my purpose?

Where am I supposed to be in life?

I look back at my efforts at trying to take up a healing modality, pottery, painting, writing, jewelry making, and see that doors closed for a reason. There are so many things in life that I love, that I find inspiration from. Instead of wearing just one hat and embodying that one title, there's another way for me to share my passions with the world.

Piece by little piece the Universe is showing me the next image to bring my vision together. 

I'm ready. 

Looking back in my journals I am reminded of a few years ago when I had taken class after class and wore myself out. 

I could feel the exhaustion in my soul.

At that time I heard to take a few years break from pursuing a 'path'. I was told to 'rest up' because in a few years I was going to be hit with my life task, and it was going to take work and effort on my part.

It is now two years later and the events of this year have woken me up. I have been shaken from my comfortable slumber and am ready to learn how to bring this vision to fruition.

Exciting times, and so very grateful.

Namaste.

10.13.2015

holding on to hope.

Source

This is, in my opinion, the best piece of writing I have ever written. I was inspired to write this after reading a favorite author of mine on elephantjournal.com . 

I put fingers to keys and out flowed these words. 

Gosh this writing thing. I'm not even aware of how these words appear. I go into a trance like state, typing faster than I'm able to process the sentences that are rolling through my head. 

I am solely the vessel here. But I kinda dig it :)

Click the link below to read for yourself :)


Namaste.

10.06.2015

the fire within me.

Source

These past few days have put me in typing overload. I seem to have opened an internal door, and from that door flames are bursting forth.

There are SO many words pouring out of me that my brain doesn't have time to process what is happening. I am clearly just the vessel here, the being that hits keys on a keyboard.

I've always been aware of the amount of words floating around inside my head and on numerous occasions have looked back and wished that I would have wrote things down. I find these bursts of insight shocking actually. There's a wisdom there that is well beyond me and the scope through which I speak. When I talk I have some of the worst grammar ever! This age of technology and social media has left me in constant use of slang like lol, cuz, and brb. It's dumbed down my vocab considerably.

So when a sentence like;

'Change the word 'fear' to 'growth'. When you feel fear recognize this as an opportunity for your own soul's growth.' 

comes forth, I almost want to knock on this internal door and say, 'Um, excuse me, but who was that just speaking??? Cuz it sure as heck wasn't me!'

These words flowing from my fingers has given me a purpose. 

I don't know anyone, so even having one reader here makes me feel like I'm being given a platform to speak my truth. Being allowed to share my words on elephantjournal.com, has given me an opportunity to reach a wider audience and hopefully resonate with them too.

My last article  posted on elephantjournal.com has been read by over 1800 people. Like Whoa!

I wouldn't have ever expected that kind of number. It shocks me, and I am grateful for the opportunity.

Something is going to happen with this writing thing, I can feel it, and I'm looking forward to seeing where this path takes me.

Namaste.